Monday, October 26, 2009

On My Dark Side...

When everything gets accumulated..and everything is messed up in my head.. and I cannot remain stable for one whole day.. maintaining the same mood... When my moods are totally fluctuating..and that heavy feeling chockes my heart... and my mind drives me crazy, and my breathless thoughts pressurise me.. and I feel like going insane, and things are painted in black.. and all is going up and down, down and up.. like a crazy roller-coaster.. When I get too scared, and have that shiver, and teary eyes.... and when I fear pain, and suffering, even if it is yet to come...I think of Death as my resort, as my abrupt escape to end any of what I fear yet to take place, of an escape to peace of mind, and relief to others around me and myself! (Though not daring to take suicidal attempts.. but I keep it as a wish and a desire I yearn to, a prayer I ask God for!)
If that's so now..What will be my state later ??!!
P.s. This part in me..freaks me out when it has this request!